Inner Bitch Moment – “Never Born”

Ah, you’ve been in a corner long enough Inner Bitch. Attack!

“Never Born”

(for Mags, Aurora, and Sam)

You’ve plenty of it
When you swagger in my direction
Your smile is large
Like you can make promises
To induce my persuasion
But I’ll tell you, love
I’m not easily swayed

I don’t play games
I’ll work you till you’re worn
Make you wish you were never born

The other girls may
Fall to your feet begging for more
And other girls may
Hang on your every single word
Like you were sent from the sky
But in my honest opinion
You’re not worth the strain

I won’t be easy
You gotta put on a better show
I’ll make you wish you were never born

It’s a shame
A losing game if you were taking score
I’ll make you wish you were never born

Before you tell me
I’m only bitter, I’ll be all alone
Paying vigil to my telephone
I regret to say
You’re the last to hear the news
You’re the last one I would ever choose

If you’re scorned
Then take it with outside the door
Hope I’ve made you wish you were never born

Inner Bitch Moment – “(Do) What I Want”

Ah hell–he unleashed a monster and didn’t even realize it.

A friend of mine sent me an article to read regarding the gender inequality in the hard sciences. If you all did not know this about me, I will reveal it now: I am a feminist. Once upon a time, in that mental garden I call undergrad, I was a Women’s Studies minor. I consider myself appreciative of science and math as well as liberal arts (which will probably incite that whole conundrum of whether or not I should have gotten my Bachelor’s in Science). I don’t believe women are better than men. We should be equal.

But who has time for a rant? 🙂


You say I fail the test
Cite my sensibility
But if you don’t give me a go
I doubt your credibility

Bump your anatomy
There is no academy
That says I can’t do what I want

Mama didn’t work on her hands and knees
So you could treat me how you please

The tool will fit
No matter the size of the hand
But you say I should be baking
Leave the heavy to a man

Screw the status quo
There is no mold
That says I can’t do what I want

My foremothers didn’t stand on the steps
So you could pass and say I did my best

Inner Bitch Moment – “What I Want”

Twice in a seven day period? What can I say?

I think of parts of this song sometimes like a schoolyard chant; the first part came to me while I was at my previous job (I had a lot of idle time on slow nights). The message of this little diddy is, I know what I am looking for and don’t you tell me different *headswivel

This feels more like Real Talk…ah, maybe I need a new category?


“What I Want”

Three little girls sitting a tree
Birds didn’t know what they heard
But the beat was rockin’
They didn’t mind bein’ disturbed

Ever since I could tie my shoe
And kick ass at four square
I wasn’t like the others
Sycophants couldn’t compare
They were hoping for Cupid
I found I didn’t care

‘Cause what I want is bigger than his name in a heart
What I want won’t fit in my shopping cart
From the clearance bin at Wal-Mart
Or dance on my screen when I press start

So hey (yeah) you (uh huh)
You say you do what you please
But no (ho) oh no (no oh)
Looks like you’re on your knees

Three little girls walkin’ down the street
Voices high to spread the word
Even motes were hoppin’
No one cared they were perturbed

I had a frog a time or two
Made me wanna be a nun
Too bad – woe is they
‘Cause I’m made of sterner stuff
Not gonna stick when it’s dire
Don’t need a bloke to have fun

Cuz what I want is better than rattling box springs
What I want is better than matching rings
What I want is not on that list of small things
That make up fancy flights and pipe dreams

So hey (yeah) you (uh huh)
You say you are emancipated
But no (ho) oh no (no oh)
Looks like you’re constipated

Three little girls rockin’ to the beat
Walls shakin’ enough to crash
No one’s keeping their seat
Girls holler back as they ask

So hey (yeah) you (uh huh)
You say you’re elated?
But no (ho) oh no (no oh)
Why you still hanging on to that jerk you dated?

‘Cause what you want is better than him
Than the nights you spent in the dim
Wallowing low in the grim
Wondering if he was really out with his friends

So hey (yeah) you (uh huh)
When are you gonna get the point?
It’s time you get what you want

Inner Bitch Moment – “I Am Not the One You Want”

Sigh. It’s been too long.

I know! It’s the holidays! This is sooo bad. But I need an Inner Bitch Moment. Comin’ up, amigos!

It’s June 2011. I had just gotten home from the first (and only) date I had with a  guy I had met online. (I can feel you all rolling your eyes. I hardly blame you.) He happened to matriculate at my alma mater, which was kind of known as a party school. So he thought I was of a certain caliber. Being a rather diligent student in undergrad, I ended up disappointing him. Poor baby.

I went home, channeled my inner Maggie Mallone, and here we are!

If I had any musical talent, I would record this (and “What I Want”–what? Soon, promise). But oh well.


“I Am Not the One You Want”

Wanna give you this PSA
It’s just better before

I wear too many layers
When the temperature starts to soar
In the middle of the party
I want a corner where I can snore
Oh surprise, you find yourself
Talking me into acting like a whore (Spoken: It’s been a while, damn!)
But when it gets
To the sticking point I’m just a bore

Here’s the news flash
You’ll get it when your head’s out of your ass
I am not the one you want

I can use
Twenty-dollar words I learned in school
But if you wanna get ahead
You’re not gonna use me as a tool
Try and get me mad
I’ve got a handle on this glacier cool (Spoken: You done lost your mind)
Mama taught me well
So I won’t stoop to act a damn fool

Here’s the real —-
Maybe if you open your eyes it would transmit
I am not the one you want

So walk on
I’m looking for an actual man
You’re mistaken
‘Cause you’re really less than
Anything I want
Is gonna do more than entertain (Spoken: Aw, that’s really cute)
And I don’t have the time
To sit through anything you’re gonna feign

Here’s the deal, love
I’m getting zilch in the sec it takes you to come
You are not the one I want

Don’t be upset
With this verisimilitude
It’s constructed
From the stink of your attitude
So excuse me
If I possess this sudden latitude (Spoken: On my level–please!)
If you left right now
We could end on an air of gratitude

One more time, just to make it done
You are not the one
I am not the one you want

I am not the one you want

Inner Bitch Moment – Anjulie’s “Brand New Bitch”

It’s definitely time for an Inner Bitch Moment!

I remember the first time I had stumbled upon Anjulie at CD Warehouse; I had heard “Rain” a few days before, and I thought to myself, Why not? Something new. I admired her writing and musical style and considered her an auspicious addition to my music collection.

A few months later (around May I think), “Brand New Bitch” hit the Internet, and I was captivated. Any girl who has been through a breakup knows that self-esteem is paramount; this song has it in spades. “Feelin’ so fly since you’ve been gone”? Damn straight!

Needless to say, I made sure this song got onto my phone ASAP and I was bumping down the street in Super Black™. Woe betide any man who got in the way! Well, at least during that song. 🙂

Inner Bitch Moment – “BALK!”

This is going to make me sound absolutely whacked, but, well–that’s the nature of the creative mind, right?

Circa 2006, I took an interest in Keira Knightley; I had a bad habit of creating a character based off of a pretty familiar face. I purchased Domino, and out of that experience came the character Magdalena “Maggie” Mallone. Maggie represents the edginess that Samantha Dunne could not quite capture; while they are both similar, Maggie possesses a jagged quality while Sam is merely tough. I had her in mind when I wrote this. While Danie acts like a conduit for my Gorgeous Inner Bitch, Maggie is an Inner Bitch of a different sort.

I like taking her out and taking her for a spin every now and again. 😉


Don’t you try
Don’t hold me down
I’ll put up a fight
Knock you ‘round 

See how you like that?
See how you like… 

I’m not the girl they said I’d be
They were mistaken thankfully
Operating on misconception
Or planning misdirection
Whatever the case, I won’t toe the line
I’ve done no crime, won’t pay no time

Don’t you try
Don’t hold me down
I’ll put up a fight
Knock you ‘round 

All you want you can gawk
At the swagger in my walk
At the sass in my talk
As long as you don’t chafe me
I won’t balk 

See how you like that?
See how you like… 

You can hide me in the back
So no one gets a heart attack
But your logic has a setback
I’m the object of attention everywhere I go
The coolest chick I know
I am not your ordinary foe 

All you want you can gawk
At the swagger in my walk
At the sass in my talk
As long as you don’t chafe me
I won’t 

You can watch me like a hawk
Think of lining me in chalk
You can keep your salt
Don’t try and break me
And I won’t 

See how you like that?
See how you like rolling in the woes
Dodging all the stones
From fake craptastic foes
And you think I ain’t hair-trigger?
Can’t see why my sass ain’t bigger?
I should be good—how do you figure?
Tried that experiment
Putting myself in a compartment
To my detriment
I am not some animal to tame
A species with a whacked out name
And some defect to claim to fame
So love me or leave me to roam
Don’t revere me but you better watch your tone 

See how you like that?
See how you like…

When I balk
When I balk
Wipe away the spit when you gawk
Leave and four-square with your chalk

I will put up a fight
Knock you around